In December, it will be 20 years since I lost you. How ironic that you spent most of your last years begging me to be healthy, yet you left us way before your time.

It is great consolation to me to know that this very public journey I've embarked on would make you proud and give you so much joy. In my heart I can feel your pride. And somehow....in the distance....I can hear your loud cackle at some of the more outrageous stuff I've written here.

I guess this is what a legacy is about. After we're gone, make sure our kids and their kids follow the path that we dreamed for them. Well Mom, this was your dream for me.

I miss you and by doing what I'm doing....I'm honoring you and your love for me.

Thanks Mom. You did good.

Jonny

PS I'm sorry that my last words to you were "You are driving me crazy, you need to go upstairs and go fuck Dad."